Originally posted on The Shepherd’s Haven Facebook page on October 20, 2021
I have to share this. I was feeling very down and depressed for a very long time, many many months, for a lot of different reasons, and I wasn’t doing anything with The Shepherd’s Haven, or my book, “Big Dreams, Scary Giants, And Itty-Bitty Grasshoppers: Letting God Make His Dreams For You Come True, “ anymore.
Despite years of giving my best effort, I wasn’t making any progress, and finally, I came to the conclusion, it was time to just give up. So I did. I didn’t announce it, not even to God, or myself. I just walked away from it, even though, in my heart I still wanted it to happen. But I realized I couldn’t force it to happen, just because I wanted it so badly.
This was not an easy, happy retirement for me, I wanted to be in the thick of winning souls for God, and helping all the hurting people around me, but I was in a frame of mind that I couldn’t even seem to help myself. My dreams and visions were dead. My book and ministry were on life support. No, truthfully, they too, were dead.
Then on March 24, earlier this year I received a ray of hope from a Facebook friend, sending me a quick message.
“Hey Lady! Been thinking about you! Hope all is well. How are things at the Shepherd’s Haven? I believe we are more in need of these services than ever. The children are in crisis. God bless you and your ministry!”
I responded noncommittally to her, “Thank you, I appreciate it.” And that was it.
And then, she wrote again in June.
“Hey Kristin! We just bought our RV. We’re hoping to make it out there soon. Would still love to meet you and visit Shepherd’s Haven!”
Dejectedly I responded to her,
“Yes hi. We still have the ranch in Arizona but we now spend most of the year in Florida. I am not actively trying to get the ministry going anymore, unless God starts letting me know He still has plans for it. I kept trying to get it going but without any help, financially or otherwise, I finally just set it aside.”
“Oh I’m sorry. I finally got into a better position to be able to travel some. We were thinking of places we’d like to see and, of course, I thought of the ranch. I’m sorry it didn’t work out the way you’d hoped. There is such a need for the ministry. Especially for the children that are being rescued from the traffickers. Wish we were all younger! God bless you!”
And I replied, “Thank you I appreciate that and agree with you. I am not saying that I wouldn’t jump right back in to do something if God let’s me know that is what He wants me to do, but being honest it just got very discouraging for me when I spent thousands of dollars to publish my book and then couldn’t even give the book away for free. So it is up to God now to make it happen or not.”
Her response was, “I gotcha. I love the dream, the idea. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
And I made the comment to her, “Thank you I appreciate it. I am still praying that it really was God that gave me the message and that in His time He will make it happen, but I finally realized that without His doing it, in my own strength it certainly won’t. If it happens, we will all know it is God’s doing.”
So that was the spark God used to start bringing a little life back into my dreams and visions. A little hope that maybe God wasn’t finished with me yet. My friend kept conversing with me, bringing back more and more hope and even excitement.
We have had many conversations now, and I am feeling full of hope and expectation to see what the Lord is going to do. A few nights ago, the Lord spoke to me in my dreams and told me something that I shared with my friend just a few hours ago, and this is what I told her. “Just think God used you to get me back on track again because I was so down I didn’t even think I could do it anymore. But God told me the other night that He deliberately allowed my dreams and visions to die, and the ministry to be all but declared dead and on life support, so that WHEN He raises the ministry from the dead, just like when He asked Ezekiel if the dead bones could live again? —EVERYONE will know that it is the power of God raising this ministry from out of nowhere. “It is not by might, nor by power, but by MY SPIRIT” saith the Lord.
And then she sent me the song I am sharing here.
After listening to it, I told her, “Lol! I love it! That is so funny you would send that to me, because it mirrors what God was telling me almost exactly— and yet I had never heard of this group or song before. Wow.
And she replied, “It’s one of our current faves and what you said brought it right to mind. Getting those Holy Ghost chills!!
To which I said, “Me too! Ok, it’s our new theme song, ha ha! God is going to raise this ministry, HIS Ministry! Cannot wait to see how He does it!